The Tillyville Times

CHOCOLATE RAIN IN STORE FOR TILLYVILLE?
by Humbert Johns

Brown cargo vans fanning out across town the past week have prompted suspicion in Tillyville. Calls by anxious residents have kept authorities on their toes.

"The phone has been ringing off the hook with questions," said Officer McDonald. "Shucks, I thought we were hosting a UPS convention myself, until I saw radar dishes on top of these vehicles, and drivers who never took off their sunglasses. Oof!"

McDonald's wife swung her purse in his stomach. "He means, never mind." She grinned.

Upon investigation, this reporter learned that the mysterious vans are actually mobile units of the prestigious and highly secret Global Chocolate Institute. Their purpose? That was revealed to me by a CGI undercover operative, whom we'll call Deep Chocolate. With his identity hidden by a straw hat, he shared with me stunning revelations.

"I suggested the site to them," he confided in a low voice, "a sleepy town like Tillyville is a perfect stage for these experiments."

Experiments?

"The newest generation of cloud seeding. Before we only tried for rain, using pellets," Deep Chocolate said. "But now the sky's the limit. Now we are using chocolate chips ... to make chocolate rain!"

Diabolical! Tummies will hurt and waistlines expand into the next county. People will have to wear bigger clothes, buy bigger cars, build bigger houses.

"All in time for Halloween," my informant said.

"This is all highly sensitive, you understand," Deep Chocolate said. "The results will have profound consequences on certain areas in Pennsylvania and Switzerland."

"But oh, there will be chocolate, all right, plenty of chocolate." Deep Chocolate's eyes gleamed. From the distance came a roll of thunder. "Mua-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!"

Read any good books lately? Seen any good movies? Send your book or movie review to Tilly@tillyville.com for possible publication in the The Tillyville Times.

Make a Wish!

Fall is here, but there's still time to make a wish in the Tillyville Fountain. Hurry before winter comes and the goldfish freeze. Make a wish today.

This Week in Tillyville

Note: The Tillyville Times will not be published on Sunday, October 24. The next issue will be Sunday October 31. Subscribers will continue to receive daily stories during this period as listed below.

Sunday Oct 17 Wanda and the Witchdoctor

WANDA: Doctor, what do you have for this frog in my throat? WITCHDOCTOR: Take two toadstools and call me Sunday morning.

Monday Oct 18 At the Driving Range

Tilly goes to the driving range to practice for the big tournament next week and finds it's no picnic.

Tuesday Oct 19 An Interesting Cloud

Chocolate Rat discovers and interesting cloud.

Wednesday Oct 20 Story Problem

Skinny is good at story problems. Too good.

Thursday Oct 21 The Story Problem's Revenge

Right.

Friday Oct 22 Last Voyage of the Starship Goody

The Starship Goody is a most unusual spacecraft, on a most unusual mission. See it fight the forces of evil and bad hair this Friday.

Saturday Oct 23 The Hm With Sausage, Pepperoni and Onion

We're serving a delicious Hm With Sausage, Pepperoni and Onion, and the best part: no calories!

Sunday Oct 24 Wanda Meets the Little Girl

Wanda the Witch has battled demons, Wanda has battled warlocks. But Wanda is no match for her archenemy, the Little Girl.

Monday Oct 25 The Golf Tournament Round 1

Live from the Eagle River Golf Club Tilly Squirrel takes on Mayor Weezul and other champion golfers.

Tuesday Oct 26 The Golf Tournament Round 2

Wednesday Oct 27 The Golf Tournament Round 3

Thursday Oct 28 The Golf Tournament Round 4

Friday Oct 29 Dorian's Halloween Haircut of Horrors

Full moon, creepy costumes and tons of great candy! Dorian trick-or-treats on Friday, wearing the coolest costume yet (which, of course, nobody gets but him).

Saturday Oct 30 Hm#22: The Hm's Strangest Voyage Yet

The Hm takes its strangest voyage yet!

Sunday Oct 31 Wanda in the Haunted House

Ready for a Halloween scare? Read Wanda in the Haunted House. We dare you.